Do you ever find yourself humming a tune or singing a song for no reason? For those of us who have a long history of music in our lives- it is so natural for us to fill the empty, to fill the quiet, with a song or a melody. I've found that as I am walking in the morning and praying that I have subconsciously started to sing in the back of my head. (For Adri-this was pre ipod) It's like I have my own built in worship band. I prefer to think that then that I'm loosing it. LOL! I have wondered why this is and as I've pondered it I've come to the conclusion that its because over time I have "Changed My Tune." My heart is singing a new song you could say- even in the midst of the trials and tribulations. Even during the times of joy and praise...I've changed my tune and am singing with a new heart.
At Bible Study on Wednesday, we had a time of worship before we got into our topic for the night. We started by singing, "I Could Sing of Your Love Forever." As we were singing, I was thinking...yes, this is really true. I really could sing of Your love forever. This is significant because there was a time when I only sang of things of the world. ie: secular music. Don't misunderstand me- there are secular songs that are ok and have good messages-I'm referring to a time in my life when all I listened to was soft rock or popular music that had worldly influences in the lyrics and not Godly ones. When I was a senior in High School, I gave my life and my heart to the Lord. I still listened to secular music but started to become exposed to the Christian music world. In college, my exposure to Christian music increased even more but I still listened to secular radio. In the middle of my college career, I got caught in a relationship that left me living on the fence of the secular and the Christian world. There were times when I was living in the world and times when I was being a Christian. As my relationship with God began to grow, I started switching the radio back and forth between secular and Christian, secular and Christian, secular and Christian. This went on for a few years until one day I decided no more....no more switching stations. I turned the dial on my stereo to the Christian station, left it there, and have never turned it back. I still lived in the world sometimes, but the influence of the Christian music and Christian programing began to grow in my heart. God used something that I loved so much- music to begin the transformation process that I might give not only my life to Him in whole but also my heart.
Eventually, I left my relationship behind and began to Change My Tune. My heart was beginning to sing a new song- one that didn't resonate with the "world" that I was trying to live in before.
Now, years later, I sing songs like "I Could Sing of Your Love Forever," and really mean it because my relationship with Him has grown so much. You should know however, that "Tune Changes" or "New Songs" don't necessarily happen over night. They require hard work, dedication, and sacrifice. They require lots of prayer, lots of studying and chewing on the word. For me, it also required dealing with the ramifications of my college relationship, with my dad's death and my lack of relationship with my mom. It also has also put me in a place of rest at various times- unwanted sabbaticals...but sabbaticals none the less. (I will talk more about this in another blog.) It may even cause some pain and grief in order to get to the joy and the praise.
Is God calling you to Change Your Tune? Is He wanting to give you a New Song?
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Angel Formations
For those who have read the blog about Pinones and the blog about the earthquake, I want to share something that I experienced yesterday. (For those who haven't go back and read them) I walk the dog early in the morning. The last few days we have gone out at day break but before the sun has come up. Yesterday, I was thinking about my conversation with my friend about the earthquake and praying over the area in which I live as I began to walk down the board walk. When I got to the end, I turned to go back the other way and saw bursts of lights in various parts of the sky. It was interesting because the sun had not risen yet. I said to the Lord that it was like seeing His glory fill the sky. As I was reflecting on that, there was sunlight illuminating a cloud formation over the area where I had been praying for the island. As I looked and watched the formation it looked like the bust of a woman as if she was leaning over and praying also. I think I saw an angel that was praying along with me. She hovered over the area for a while before moving on. And when that happened, the sun began to rise out of the ocean to shed it's morning light over the island.
It won't be long now before the Son is shining over the entire island once again and not just in spots. Thank you Jesus!!
It won't be long now before the Son is shining over the entire island once again and not just in spots. Thank you Jesus!!
Loving our Neighbor
I saw something recently that just made me smile. There is a guy in the church who lives in section 8 type housing. His room is small and he has to share a bathroom with other people on his floor. He lives off of government assistance as he struggles to break free from his addiction. As he is making strides and growing in his relationship with the Lord, I see him reaching out to others and taking huge, bold, risks. A few weeks ago, he went through his building and invited people to Bible Study- even the ones that he had internal fights with God about asking. Them? You want me to invite them? We chuckle and laugh, but the reality is that the majority of us have had similar experiences. So, what have we done? I don't know how many doors he knocked on but 5 people came as a result of his obedience in knocking on the doors.
Much to his surprise, pastor decided to watch a movie that night- so, Bible Study was centered around the watching of "Letters to God" and munching on some tasty popcorn. I wonder if he was relieved? It was obvious that some of the people didn't want to be there at first but as the topic of the night was presented tensions started to ease. During the movie it was a little cold because of the air conditioning. I saw my friend get up and find a blanket for one of the guys he invited. It was touching because he took the blanket and wrapped it around the one who was cold. It might seem like a woman thing to react that way, but I am able to see it with different eyes or from a different perspective. I think metaphorically, he was wrapping the warmth and love of God around his friend. Isn't that what loving your neighbor is all about? Wrapping the warmth and love of God around the ones whom He surrounds us with?
Much to his surprise, pastor decided to watch a movie that night- so, Bible Study was centered around the watching of "Letters to God" and munching on some tasty popcorn. I wonder if he was relieved? It was obvious that some of the people didn't want to be there at first but as the topic of the night was presented tensions started to ease. During the movie it was a little cold because of the air conditioning. I saw my friend get up and find a blanket for one of the guys he invited. It was touching because he took the blanket and wrapped it around the one who was cold. It might seem like a woman thing to react that way, but I am able to see it with different eyes or from a different perspective. I think metaphorically, he was wrapping the warmth and love of God around his friend. Isn't that what loving your neighbor is all about? Wrapping the warmth and love of God around the ones whom He surrounds us with?
Friday, August 20, 2010
Get Ready Puerto Rico...An Earthquake is Coming!
People, get ready!! Puerto Rico is going to have an earthquake! Saying that Puerto Rico is going to have an earthquake is like saying that it's going to rain or that the ocean is wet. Both are true. And, Puerto Rico will likely to continue to have earthquakes. It only makes sense because islands are created from volcanic eruptions and our island sits on a fault line. Yes, Puerto Rico is going to have an earthquake! The only problem that I find with this statement is that so called "prophets" say this in front of churches when they are preaching as if they are predicting something new or some unique word that the Lord has given to them. Or they say that the Lord has given them a vision of a tsunami washing over the island. Plain common sense says, "Duh, so tell me something that I don't already know." But instead, people take the word of these so called "prophets" to be the gospel truth and people begin to panic. They start calling up their friends and family warning them of the impending doom and to stock up, be prepared, get ready-disaster is about to strike!! Fear and unrest begin to move amongst the people; and in the midst of this fear and confusion, I have to question- is that really from God? Common sense tells me yes, we will have an earthquake. And yes, there is even a possibility of a tsunami. Natural conditions are right for that also, but should I be scared? Do I need to be afraid? Should I go out to the mountain top and shout this message out to the people- creating fear and panic? I don't think so.
I was talking to a friend of mine the other day and we were talking about the area in which I live (see a previous blog post if you are not familiar with Pinones) and the spiritual condition of the island in general. She was telling me that when she moved here- people covered her with prayer and continually, it was revealed to her that the island is a place of unrest and a place where satan has rooted himself deeply. She mentioned that she had heard people preach/predict/prophesy-whatever you want to call it that Puerto Rico is going to have an earthquake or Puerto Rico is going to have a Tsunami and that her experience has been that it has only created a sense of fear among the people. Her face was saddened and perplexed as she said that- but I assured her that indeed these predictions are correct but not in the way in which people are portraying them and casting fear into the people. This is what I shared...
On Easter Sunday of this year, my roommate woke up early because she was playing in the worship band and they were meeting at 4am to set up the equipment for the Sunrise service. The dogs were stirred and I was awake also. The Lord spoke to my heart and said to get up and to go to the site and pray before the service. As I knelt on my knees and began to praise the Lord and worship him in prayer, He began to speak a loud and profound message to my heart. He said, Enough is enough and I am taking my island back. These are my people and I have had enough of satan's foothold on my island and over my people. It is no mistake that you are worshiping at El Morro for the first time in years as this was once the gateway into the city and the place that provided protection from the oncoming enemy. (El Morro is a huge fort that rests at the edge of the island or ocean in Old San Juan. Soldiers would stand in lookout ports through out the fort looking for incoming ships with needed supplies but also for ships that belonged to the enemy.) He continued to say- Shout to the east- Shout to the west and declare that I am the Lord over this island and over these people. Tell them I will be their fort. I will be their source of protection. I will be the one in whom they can hide.
So, I told my friend "yes, what you are saying is correct. Puerto Rico is going to have an earthquake...Puerto Rico is going to experience a tsunami...and yes, they very well could be of the natural variety; but I believe the true message that God is trying to convey through people who are preaching His word is not one of natural disaster but rather one of supernatural restoration and revival." He is preparing to shake this land and to shake the people and to flood them with his overwhelming love in a way that is so strong and so powerful- a way that the people have never experienced before. So, we do need to call up friends and family and tell them to get prepared. We need to band together and begin fasting and praying and preparing for the spiritual battle that will come as the Lord begins to shake this place and to move His people. We need to be prepared for the fight against the evil one as he struggles to keep his chains bound around this island and its people. We need to dress ourselves in Holy clothes and go out marching in front of the army singing hymns to the Lord. We need to get ready for the earthquake!
I was talking to a friend of mine the other day and we were talking about the area in which I live (see a previous blog post if you are not familiar with Pinones) and the spiritual condition of the island in general. She was telling me that when she moved here- people covered her with prayer and continually, it was revealed to her that the island is a place of unrest and a place where satan has rooted himself deeply. She mentioned that she had heard people preach/predict/prophesy-whatever you want to call it that Puerto Rico is going to have an earthquake or Puerto Rico is going to have a Tsunami and that her experience has been that it has only created a sense of fear among the people. Her face was saddened and perplexed as she said that- but I assured her that indeed these predictions are correct but not in the way in which people are portraying them and casting fear into the people. This is what I shared...
On Easter Sunday of this year, my roommate woke up early because she was playing in the worship band and they were meeting at 4am to set up the equipment for the Sunrise service. The dogs were stirred and I was awake also. The Lord spoke to my heart and said to get up and to go to the site and pray before the service. As I knelt on my knees and began to praise the Lord and worship him in prayer, He began to speak a loud and profound message to my heart. He said, Enough is enough and I am taking my island back. These are my people and I have had enough of satan's foothold on my island and over my people. It is no mistake that you are worshiping at El Morro for the first time in years as this was once the gateway into the city and the place that provided protection from the oncoming enemy. (El Morro is a huge fort that rests at the edge of the island or ocean in Old San Juan. Soldiers would stand in lookout ports through out the fort looking for incoming ships with needed supplies but also for ships that belonged to the enemy.) He continued to say- Shout to the east- Shout to the west and declare that I am the Lord over this island and over these people. Tell them I will be their fort. I will be their source of protection. I will be the one in whom they can hide.
So, I told my friend "yes, what you are saying is correct. Puerto Rico is going to have an earthquake...Puerto Rico is going to experience a tsunami...and yes, they very well could be of the natural variety; but I believe the true message that God is trying to convey through people who are preaching His word is not one of natural disaster but rather one of supernatural restoration and revival." He is preparing to shake this land and to shake the people and to flood them with his overwhelming love in a way that is so strong and so powerful- a way that the people have never experienced before. So, we do need to call up friends and family and tell them to get prepared. We need to band together and begin fasting and praying and preparing for the spiritual battle that will come as the Lord begins to shake this place and to move His people. We need to be prepared for the fight against the evil one as he struggles to keep his chains bound around this island and its people. We need to dress ourselves in Holy clothes and go out marching in front of the army singing hymns to the Lord. We need to get ready for the earthquake!
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Dry and Thirsty
I feel so dry. Like a sponge that is all dried up and needs to be re-hydrated. That's what I said to the Lord a few days ago as I was walking the dog. It made me think of Psalm 63:1 "O God, you are my God. Earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water." Both my statement and this verse are ironic on so many levels; especially, since I live on an island and we are in the middle of the rainy season. It's been anything but "dry." LOL. But the reality is that I while I am surrounded by water and being rained on at the moment- I live on dry land. A dry land that is full of violence. A land that is tired and weary. A land that is busy, busy, busy. A land that is desperate. A land that is probably not much different than other places but a land that is dry none the less.
As I continued to walk up the road, I turned the corner to begin my journey back the other direction on the Board Walk. The Board Walk is along the ocean. The Lord reminded me that the kind of water that we drink is important. More often than not, we drink from the ocean which may seem refreshing at first, but only makes us more thirsty in the long run. The more thirsty we get, the more we drink and the more we drink- the more we place ourselves at risk for dehydration and kidney failure. We must drinking fresh water. Water that is pure and gives life. Water from the Living Spring.
So, with this awareness- why do we drink from the ocean and not from the Living Spring? Why do we turn on the tv instead of listening to a Christian CD? Why do we find going out and having a few drinks more comforting than sitting down and reading a few passages from the scriptures? Why do we choose to lay down and take a nap instead of getting on our knees and spending a few minutes with our Creator? Please understand that as I ask these questions that I am in essence-"preaching to the choir." Even though I am a pastor, a Christian, a servant of the Lord, a Christ follower- whatever label you want to place on me- I too drink from the ocean sometimes. Why? Why, do I allow myself to fall into the trap? Why do I find it such a chore sometimes to drag my butt up out of bed in the morning and to open my Bible to see what God has for me that day? Why do I sometimes insist on drinking from the ocean? I know that sometimes I drink from the ocean because I suffer from the Martha syndrome. The island is in such need. There is so much work to be done and so many lives to be touched. The people are so thirsty from all of the ocean water they have been drinking. And, I LOVE to be so busy doing the Lord's work that sometimes, I don't stop to be like Mary- to drink from the Living Springs. How about you? Why do you drink from the ocean?
I'm so incredibly thankful that when I become to Martha"ish" and start to feel dry that the Lord speaks to my spirit so that I can confess and make the choice to correct the situation.
My prayer today is to be filled with the Living Water. Filled to overflowing so that those who are dry can stand next to me with their cups and begin to be filled with the blessing of the same Living Water that He has given me so that the land that is dry will soon be re-hydrated with Water that will bring new Life.
As I continued to walk up the road, I turned the corner to begin my journey back the other direction on the Board Walk. The Board Walk is along the ocean. The Lord reminded me that the kind of water that we drink is important. More often than not, we drink from the ocean which may seem refreshing at first, but only makes us more thirsty in the long run. The more thirsty we get, the more we drink and the more we drink- the more we place ourselves at risk for dehydration and kidney failure. We must drinking fresh water. Water that is pure and gives life. Water from the Living Spring.
So, with this awareness- why do we drink from the ocean and not from the Living Spring? Why do we turn on the tv instead of listening to a Christian CD? Why do we find going out and having a few drinks more comforting than sitting down and reading a few passages from the scriptures? Why do we choose to lay down and take a nap instead of getting on our knees and spending a few minutes with our Creator? Please understand that as I ask these questions that I am in essence-"preaching to the choir." Even though I am a pastor, a Christian, a servant of the Lord, a Christ follower- whatever label you want to place on me- I too drink from the ocean sometimes. Why? Why, do I allow myself to fall into the trap? Why do I find it such a chore sometimes to drag my butt up out of bed in the morning and to open my Bible to see what God has for me that day? Why do I sometimes insist on drinking from the ocean? I know that sometimes I drink from the ocean because I suffer from the Martha syndrome. The island is in such need. There is so much work to be done and so many lives to be touched. The people are so thirsty from all of the ocean water they have been drinking. And, I LOVE to be so busy doing the Lord's work that sometimes, I don't stop to be like Mary- to drink from the Living Springs. How about you? Why do you drink from the ocean?
I'm so incredibly thankful that when I become to Martha"ish" and start to feel dry that the Lord speaks to my spirit so that I can confess and make the choice to correct the situation.
My prayer today is to be filled with the Living Water. Filled to overflowing so that those who are dry can stand next to me with their cups and begin to be filled with the blessing of the same Living Water that He has given me so that the land that is dry will soon be re-hydrated with Water that will bring new Life.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Irony or an Answer to Prayer?
Currently, I live in Pinones, Puerto Rico. Pinones is in the San Juan metro area- actually, we are right behind the airport. Anyway, the area where I live has a long, long, long history of witch craft, satanism, and voodoo. I understand from a friend that when the slaves were freed that the Governor of Puerto Rico offered them asylum here. Evidently, there were still slaves here on the island and the people were very upset about this situation because they didn't know who was free and who wasn't. So, all of the freed slaves were pushed into living in this area of the island and in Loiza which is another town just up the road in order that the islanders would know who was free and who wasn't. Anyway, with all of this, we live in a culture that is "rich" in practicing witchcraft and voodooism.
I've always wondered about this area and even have been to one of the beaches a few times, but like the old adage goes-"Out of site out of mind." Well, now that I'm here- it's on my mind. I have met some of my neighbors and am plotting and planning ways in which I can reach out to them. I think I need to note that not all of them have gotten caught up in the ways of this culture, but a few of them have. I also have been praying for the community in general. The last couple of days, I have found myself asking the Lord to transform this place, this community, into something that people will not even recognize. A community in which people will say..."it once was...but not anymore." And, I have the audacity to believe that this will actually happen.
Tonight, as I was walking along the boardwalk, I was praying for exactly what I shared in the previous paragraph. As I walked along, I saw a tall bamboo like pole that had been placed in the sand. As I got closer, I saw that the pole had a smaller limb tied to it making it look like a cross.
As I stood on the boardwalk and looked at this cross in the sand, I noticed that there were no footprints near or around the pole. It could be that I didn't see any because the sand under the boardwalk and about 3-4 feet in front of it is soft and so foot prints don't show. I also considered the possibility that because the pole was in the more "solid" part of the beach that maybe, the tide had washed the footprints away. But, when I was there, the tide wasn't that far up the beach.
So, is it irony? I don't think so. I have the audacity to believe that God placed it there and that it is symbolic to the answer of my prayer. God is going to take this community back and He has left his sign on the beach to prove it.
Now, let the transformation begin!
I've always wondered about this area and even have been to one of the beaches a few times, but like the old adage goes-"Out of site out of mind." Well, now that I'm here- it's on my mind. I have met some of my neighbors and am plotting and planning ways in which I can reach out to them. I think I need to note that not all of them have gotten caught up in the ways of this culture, but a few of them have. I also have been praying for the community in general. The last couple of days, I have found myself asking the Lord to transform this place, this community, into something that people will not even recognize. A community in which people will say..."it once was...but not anymore." And, I have the audacity to believe that this will actually happen.
Tonight, as I was walking along the boardwalk, I was praying for exactly what I shared in the previous paragraph. As I walked along, I saw a tall bamboo like pole that had been placed in the sand. As I got closer, I saw that the pole had a smaller limb tied to it making it look like a cross.
As I stood on the boardwalk and looked at this cross in the sand, I noticed that there were no footprints near or around the pole. It could be that I didn't see any because the sand under the boardwalk and about 3-4 feet in front of it is soft and so foot prints don't show. I also considered the possibility that because the pole was in the more "solid" part of the beach that maybe, the tide had washed the footprints away. But, when I was there, the tide wasn't that far up the beach.
So, is it irony? I don't think so. I have the audacity to believe that God placed it there and that it is symbolic to the answer of my prayer. God is going to take this community back and He has left his sign on the beach to prove it.
Now, let the transformation begin!
Saturday, May 1, 2010
You've Got the Power
This morning, as I was walking on the Board Walk, I turned and started walking towards the rising sun. I couldn't help but begin to Praise His name as I walked towards its direction. My praising reminded me that we have the power. In Revelation 4 John writes about what he is seeing in heaven. He writes that "Each of the four living creatures has six wings and was covered with eyes all around, even under his wings. Day and night they never stopped saying:
"Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come."
In verse nine he goes on to say that
"Whenever the living creatures give glory, honor and thanks to him who sits on the throne and who lives forever and ever, the twenty four elders fall down before him who sits on the throne, and worship him who lives forever and ever. They lay their crowns before the thrown and say, 'You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being'."
A few years ago, the Lord spoke to me about this verse and how we, like the living creatures in heaven, have power when we are praising Him. He showed me that we too are living creatures and when we give thanks to him who sits on the throne forever and ever that the twenty four elders fall down before him and worship him forever and ever. We have the power! This is an awesome insight to know that when we praise Him here on earth that we create a reaction in the heavens that is a reflection of what is happening here. We have the power! But, do we use it to its fullest potential? I don't think so because as I continued to reflect the Lord showed me water flowing from the heavens. It wasn't rain, but rather a sheet of water. Just imagine when something like a sink overflows and you have a large amount of water running over the side. The impression I had in my spirit is that God is just waiting for us to praise Him so much that the heavens overflow back to the earth and that we keep this flow of praising Him going strong so that the waters will never stop flowing. This has so many implications...we can keep the well from running dry....we can be continually washed...the world around us can be transformed...but, not if we don't use our power....
"Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come."
In verse nine he goes on to say that
"Whenever the living creatures give glory, honor and thanks to him who sits on the throne and who lives forever and ever, the twenty four elders fall down before him who sits on the throne, and worship him who lives forever and ever. They lay their crowns before the thrown and say, 'You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being'."
A few years ago, the Lord spoke to me about this verse and how we, like the living creatures in heaven, have power when we are praising Him. He showed me that we too are living creatures and when we give thanks to him who sits on the throne forever and ever that the twenty four elders fall down before him and worship him forever and ever. We have the power! This is an awesome insight to know that when we praise Him here on earth that we create a reaction in the heavens that is a reflection of what is happening here. We have the power! But, do we use it to its fullest potential? I don't think so because as I continued to reflect the Lord showed me water flowing from the heavens. It wasn't rain, but rather a sheet of water. Just imagine when something like a sink overflows and you have a large amount of water running over the side. The impression I had in my spirit is that God is just waiting for us to praise Him so much that the heavens overflow back to the earth and that we keep this flow of praising Him going strong so that the waters will never stop flowing. This has so many implications...we can keep the well from running dry....we can be continually washed...the world around us can be transformed...but, not if we don't use our power....
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
How Long is Your Leash?
I think that I am on a roll! LOL This morning, I had a conversation with my roomie about this retractable leash that she gave me. We had been fussing a few weeks ago about my technique ,or lack there of, in retracting the leash when a car is coming down our alley way so as to protect the dog. Well, anyway, to make the long story short- the leash broke this morning as you may have read and my roomie was nice enough to fix it. But, I in my stubborn way and our fussing about my technique...LOL....decided I was going to go back to the old way of walking the dog- a plain old 6 ft leash because as I mentioned in the last post- I am going to be her Master again.
So, I hooked our old leash to her collar and off we went. As we were walking, I was thinking about the issue I have with the other leash. You see, I like it because its 20 feet as opposed to 6 and so when she wants to play with the other dogs as we are walking- she has the freedom to do so. The problem lies when she has stretched the leash out to its limit and a car is coming. I find myself tugging on the actual leash to get her out of harms way because the leash won't retract. At least for me it won't. Anyway, all of this is to say that here we have yet another lesson for the day. I think that God likes us on a shorter leash. We talked in the last post about staying close to the Master and the importance of doing so. When we have extra cord that takes us further away, it's harder for Him to get us back. A shorter leash is easier to manage and to wrangle back in when pending danger is coming near. I do believe that we have the choice to stay close or to walk further away. That would be Free Will. God is not going to tie us up to the tree and try to keep us confined but rather is going to give us the freedom to learn and to grow. The question is are we going to be connected to Him with a short leash or a long one? The choice is ours.
Don't be fooled. You can be on a short leash and still get into trouble. For example, when I was in College, I was a new Christian and I had gotten into a relationship that was not pleasing to God. I was trying to be in the world and be a Christian at the same time, but it wasn't working. I was in turmoil a lot as to whether or not this relationship was ok with God. Some days it seemed so and most days it didn't. My leash began to grow. During this time, I was involved in my home church and in the Campus Ministry and as my relationship with God grew, the shorter the leash became and the more I knew that I had to exit this relationship stage left. God didn't chase after me. He let me go and do my thing kind of like the prodigal son; but, at the same time, He never left my side and always waited for me to come back. I came to realize that my leash had gotten to long and was coming close to breaking and that I needed to lean in to Jesus for repair. And thus I did.
How long is your leash?
So, I hooked our old leash to her collar and off we went. As we were walking, I was thinking about the issue I have with the other leash. You see, I like it because its 20 feet as opposed to 6 and so when she wants to play with the other dogs as we are walking- she has the freedom to do so. The problem lies when she has stretched the leash out to its limit and a car is coming. I find myself tugging on the actual leash to get her out of harms way because the leash won't retract. At least for me it won't. Anyway, all of this is to say that here we have yet another lesson for the day. I think that God likes us on a shorter leash. We talked in the last post about staying close to the Master and the importance of doing so. When we have extra cord that takes us further away, it's harder for Him to get us back. A shorter leash is easier to manage and to wrangle back in when pending danger is coming near. I do believe that we have the choice to stay close or to walk further away. That would be Free Will. God is not going to tie us up to the tree and try to keep us confined but rather is going to give us the freedom to learn and to grow. The question is are we going to be connected to Him with a short leash or a long one? The choice is ours.
Don't be fooled. You can be on a short leash and still get into trouble. For example, when I was in College, I was a new Christian and I had gotten into a relationship that was not pleasing to God. I was trying to be in the world and be a Christian at the same time, but it wasn't working. I was in turmoil a lot as to whether or not this relationship was ok with God. Some days it seemed so and most days it didn't. My leash began to grow. During this time, I was involved in my home church and in the Campus Ministry and as my relationship with God grew, the shorter the leash became and the more I knew that I had to exit this relationship stage left. God didn't chase after me. He let me go and do my thing kind of like the prodigal son; but, at the same time, He never left my side and always waited for me to come back. I came to realize that my leash had gotten to long and was coming close to breaking and that I needed to lean in to Jesus for repair. And thus I did.
How long is your leash?
Who's the Pilot?
Yesterday, I wrote about the Galatians 2:11-21 passage that was in my devotional reading. I want to comment on this passage again taking it from the perspective of what the author wrote in the devotional. He began the devotional with mentioning the bumper sticker that says, "Jesus is my copilot." He acknowledged that this bothers him because Jesus didn't come to be just a spiritual co pilot once in a while-he's meant to be in the drivers seat.
This is true. Jesus is meant to be in the drivers seat leading and guiding us around. We ask him that in our prayers- "Please lead and guide me, please direct my steps, please be the lamp unto my feet, etc...but yet when we get up off of our knees, we climb back into the drivers seat and look over at Jesus for the directions to where we are going. Its kind of like this: I walk my dog every day. Lately, she has been grabbing a hold of the end of the leash near her mouth and holding it while we walk down the Board Walk. It appears that she is taking me for the walk, rather than vice versa. Admittedly, it is amusing...but is this how it's supposed to be? I'm her Master. I'm the one who should be guiding her not her guiding me- yet she walks in front of me leading me along. The same is with our relationship with God. We say that we want Him to be our Master and yet when we get down to the nitty gritty we take control over everything that we do. And, while we are theoretically tied to the Lord, we walk ahead of Him trying to lead the relationship. This may be ok for a while but eventually, the leash is going to break- like it did this morning.
I think that we don't always mean to control the relationship-it happens, it's been programed into us since we were old enough to know better. Again, cultural influence says that we have to be in charge, in control, and have it all together but the reality is- from what I have read, that isn't what the Bible says. It tells me that we are a bunch of messed up people in need of a Savior and without him we will get lost. We even have moments where we give up control, but we always take it back at least a small part of it. I tied the end of the broken leash around Missy's collar but left the hook part attached until we got home. As we finished our walk, Missy took what was left of the leash attached to the hook and put it in her mouth- again, thinking that she was in control and taking me for the walk. Do we not do that too?
We have to make the choice daily to follow the lead of our Master and to walk beside Him or behind Him but not in front of Him. There are times when we should allow Him to walk ahead of us to prepare the way, but know clearly that like Jesus, He will not leave us to walk alone.This is easy said than done because what I am saying is that we essentially have to walk in Faith and that is not easy; but are you willing to at least try?
This is true. Jesus is meant to be in the drivers seat leading and guiding us around. We ask him that in our prayers- "Please lead and guide me, please direct my steps, please be the lamp unto my feet, etc...but yet when we get up off of our knees, we climb back into the drivers seat and look over at Jesus for the directions to where we are going. Its kind of like this: I walk my dog every day. Lately, she has been grabbing a hold of the end of the leash near her mouth and holding it while we walk down the Board Walk. It appears that she is taking me for the walk, rather than vice versa. Admittedly, it is amusing...but is this how it's supposed to be? I'm her Master. I'm the one who should be guiding her not her guiding me- yet she walks in front of me leading me along. The same is with our relationship with God. We say that we want Him to be our Master and yet when we get down to the nitty gritty we take control over everything that we do. And, while we are theoretically tied to the Lord, we walk ahead of Him trying to lead the relationship. This may be ok for a while but eventually, the leash is going to break- like it did this morning.
I think that we don't always mean to control the relationship-it happens, it's been programed into us since we were old enough to know better. Again, cultural influence says that we have to be in charge, in control, and have it all together but the reality is- from what I have read, that isn't what the Bible says. It tells me that we are a bunch of messed up people in need of a Savior and without him we will get lost. We even have moments where we give up control, but we always take it back at least a small part of it. I tied the end of the broken leash around Missy's collar but left the hook part attached until we got home. As we finished our walk, Missy took what was left of the leash attached to the hook and put it in her mouth- again, thinking that she was in control and taking me for the walk. Do we not do that too?
We have to make the choice daily to follow the lead of our Master and to walk beside Him or behind Him but not in front of Him. There are times when we should allow Him to walk ahead of us to prepare the way, but know clearly that like Jesus, He will not leave us to walk alone.This is easy said than done because what I am saying is that we essentially have to walk in Faith and that is not easy; but are you willing to at least try?
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Who influnences who?
I was reading one of my devotionals and the scripture text was from Galatians 2:11-21. I thought to myself, how interesting because we are studying Galatians in Bible Study and that very text was what we talked about last week. Last Wednesday, we talked about the reasons why Paul confronted Peter in front of the other leadership as to his actions when he was with Jews as opposed to non Jews. During Bible Study, I thought to myself....isn't this soooooo us!? I mean how many times have we been one way and then turned around and been another? Are you following? I thought to myself...no, none of us would ever fall into that trap!! Yea, right! The reality is that we do get caught acting one way with one set of friends and another with other friends. There are some things that you would share with some people but would never in a million years think of telling others. And, we can think of a million excuses as to why this is so and feel justified in doing so. Let me say it a different way...maybe, you have a group of friends that you feel free to use inappropriate language around but say you would never use that same language around your family. Maybe, you tell crude jokes but would never do so otherwise outside of a certain circle of people. It's true! When I was in college, my campus pastor said that pastors tell and send the most crude jokes. I thought surely, she had to be kidding. I can honestly say that since becoming a pastor she's right. AND, I have been a guilty party in sending some bad joke emails to a couple of people. We do it. We think it's funny; and what's the harm?
Sorry, pastors! I'm not trying to throw anyone under the bus! I'm just thinking out loud, sharing an observation that I have made and being honest about how I have also been like Peter at times.
I would take this thought one step further and say that this passage is also a passage that reflects what Paul says in Romans 12:2 about not conforming to the world but rather being transformed by the renewing of the Spirit. Others say...we are to be in the world but not of the world. But does it really happen that way? If we take a hard look at our lives- hopefully, there will only be a few places where the world leaks in but for many the world consumes us and has quietly taken over our lives. For example, I was reading a book where the author did an experiment. She taped 10 minutes of a popular tv program and showed it to a group of people. She asked them to count how many times a sexual innuendo of any type was made during that 10 minute segment. Most people only caught a few but the reality was that in 10 minutes there were something like over 40 innuendos made. Things like this are so common place that we have accepted it and become numb to the fact that it is happening- that we are absorbing what culture is feeding us. Thus in turn, we take this into the church with us and eventually, it begins to quietly take over there also. Pastors and seminarians and people who are interested in church culture talk for hours about how statics show that the culture influences the church more than, if at all, the church influencing the culture. We talk about how we need to make the paradigm shift in the local church in order to switch who influences who but we can't have this kind of a shift until we make the shift in our own personal lives. People may walk in and see resemblances of "the church" such as pews, the alter, people greeting them at the doors, etc but when they get past the facade and get to the heart of the church- they discover that there isn't much difference between them and the outside world if there is any difference at all. Ouch! That's why we get called hypocrits I think. If we were more honest with those on the outside about how messed up we are and that church is the place where we are seeking healing...in the sense that its a place where you are developing your relationship with Jesus and He is the healer of your life. The church is the place where you can go to worship your healer along with the other people who are seeking healing also. And, church is a place where you find people who support one another on the journey.
Is culture influencing you or are you influencing the culture? If the first part of the question is you...what are you going to do to make the paradigm shift in your life? If the second part of the question is you...what do you do to keep the culture from seeping into your life?
Sorry, pastors! I'm not trying to throw anyone under the bus! I'm just thinking out loud, sharing an observation that I have made and being honest about how I have also been like Peter at times.
I would take this thought one step further and say that this passage is also a passage that reflects what Paul says in Romans 12:2 about not conforming to the world but rather being transformed by the renewing of the Spirit. Others say...we are to be in the world but not of the world. But does it really happen that way? If we take a hard look at our lives- hopefully, there will only be a few places where the world leaks in but for many the world consumes us and has quietly taken over our lives. For example, I was reading a book where the author did an experiment. She taped 10 minutes of a popular tv program and showed it to a group of people. She asked them to count how many times a sexual innuendo of any type was made during that 10 minute segment. Most people only caught a few but the reality was that in 10 minutes there were something like over 40 innuendos made. Things like this are so common place that we have accepted it and become numb to the fact that it is happening- that we are absorbing what culture is feeding us. Thus in turn, we take this into the church with us and eventually, it begins to quietly take over there also. Pastors and seminarians and people who are interested in church culture talk for hours about how statics show that the culture influences the church more than, if at all, the church influencing the culture. We talk about how we need to make the paradigm shift in the local church in order to switch who influences who but we can't have this kind of a shift until we make the shift in our own personal lives. People may walk in and see resemblances of "the church" such as pews, the alter, people greeting them at the doors, etc but when they get past the facade and get to the heart of the church- they discover that there isn't much difference between them and the outside world if there is any difference at all. Ouch! That's why we get called hypocrits I think. If we were more honest with those on the outside about how messed up we are and that church is the place where we are seeking healing...in the sense that its a place where you are developing your relationship with Jesus and He is the healer of your life. The church is the place where you can go to worship your healer along with the other people who are seeking healing also. And, church is a place where you find people who support one another on the journey.
Is culture influencing you or are you influencing the culture? If the first part of the question is you...what are you going to do to make the paradigm shift in your life? If the second part of the question is you...what do you do to keep the culture from seeping into your life?
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Another Dog Tale
I was thinking earlier that I should have named my Blog "Tales From the Dog House." I think I told you in my last Blog that I live with a friend of mine who rescues stray dogs from the streets. It seems that there is never a lack of material while living here. I could tell some funny stories; but in the same breath, I could tell some stories that might break your heart like Princessa. Anyway, this past weekend was no exception to the regular excitement that we have happening on the ranch. On Friday or Saturday, I noticed that one of the dogs outside had a bald side on the side of her backside. Being the nosy person that I am...I mean inquisitive person....I asked what was up with the bald spot. My friend said it could be a number of things and so we decided to clean and spray the spot with some anti fungal solution. On Saturday, I noticed that Missy was chewing on her tail a bit more than usual. Seems like she got whatever the other dog had. We sprayed her also but not without a minor fight. We've since determined that they both have contracted ring worm. So, in an effort to help my poor girl out- we gave her a bath and then poured a sulfer solution over her body. Then, my friend placed 2 Elizabeth collars on her- a conventional plastic one that turns her into a cone head and an inflatable one that alone looks like a life preserver. Why two? Well neither of them fit the way we need them to and we were fighting with her not to bite her tail. Now, she's running up and down the hall trying to get out of her new contraptions. At one point, I stopped her- picked her up and just held her in my arms. I rocked with her back and forth trying to comfort her and telling her it was going to be ok. As I stood there with her, I couldn't help but wonder- 2 things. First, I joked on my FB status that I think this is God's funny way of preparing me for motherhood. Hey, I've learned a lot about being a mom from having a dog! But as I stood there- I wondered...wow, what experiences will I have with my child(ren) that I will hold them in my arms, trying to comfort them and assure them that everything will be ok? If you are a parent, you could share with me lots of examples-I know; but God, which ones will be unique to me?
The other thing that I wondered was is this a reflection, a pre-taste, of what is to happen as my ministry to the homeless and those in low income housing continues to grow? Who will I be holding in my arms, comforting them and trying to reassure them that everything is going to be ok? Will it be a mother who has lost her son to gang warfare? Will it be an addict from the streets who is going through detox? Will it be the "crazy" lady from across the street who is not really crazy but has serious mental health issues that have not been addressed properly? In the book, "Souls in the Hands of a Tender God" the author tells of his journey of meeting people on the streets and how he develops relationships with them. Often times, it just begins with a simple hello as they walk by each other which eventually leads to him helping them with a bigger problem or issue. He also discusses what it really means to walk with someone on the journey from the beginning to the point until they are ready to fly on their own. It's not an easy journey. It's full of heartache and pain. It's full of triumph and joy. It's full of ups and downs and mountains and valleys. With the short attention span and the busy lives that we have these days- who's going to be willing to really walk on the journey?
It takes a lot of commitment to walk on the journey with someone. It takes a lot of stamina and endurance and patience and understanding and so much more; but mostly, it takes a lot of love. But do I have that much love? Missy has only had her condition for a couple of days and she has already scratched me up from holding her down to be sprayed. I think for a mil a second when I was giving her a bath she actually considered biting me when I attempted to cut some of the hair from her tail. (For those who know her- that might have been a shocking statement. Missy is the kind of dog who will hang and chill with you. Biting is not her style at all.) She's looked longingly at me with her big brown eyes pleading with me to help her but at the same time being in the midst of pain and fear. What I'm trying to say is that- I can see in her eyes that she longs for help but is afraid that it will hurt more. She's torn. I'm torn. But yet, I'm her mother for all intents and purposes. It's my job to take care of her. My job to keep her safe. My job to help her get better when she's not feeling well...but sometimes it hurts. It hurts her and it hurts me. I have made the decision to do whatever I have to do to be the best mom to her. I love her!
In the same manner, do I have enough love for the ones I work with on the streets and in the casarios? Will I have the same attitude and concern when someone I love is clawing and scratching at me as they withdraw from drugs? Will I stand there at take whatever tongue lashing they give to me because they are in pain, are hurt, angry and confused? Will I still love them when they walk away from everything that I have done for them to help them have a better life to go back to their old ways? Will I still love them when they repeatedly come back to me begging for forgiveness and then turn around and do what has hurt or offended me again? Will I love them?
Friday, April 2, 2010
A Dog Tale
I now live with a friend of mine who has a ministry of rescuing stray dogs from the streets of Puerto Rico. She takes them in and watches them for a few days-checking out their behavior and a few other things. Then, she takes them to the vet to get all of their shots up to date and to have tests run for Heart Worm, etc... If they have not been sterilized then she makes sure that they get "fixed" as well. After they have a clean bill of health, she adopts them out to loving families. Most of the dogs are actually shipped to a couple of shelters in the United States where they find new warm and loving homes.
A few weeks ago, a guy from the streets who helps my friend clean the dog crates stood at our gate and begged her to take his mom's dog. Princesa, a real live ankle bitter....I mean chihuahua...looked like the majority of all of the other dogs who come through this ministry. They are extremely thin and in need and a great amount of TLC. So, we took her in. I took a picture of her and showed her to some friends who are actively searching for a second dog. I told them that after she goes to the vet for a check up- she would be all theirs. In the mean time, my friend and I began dreaming of the great life that she would have and how spoiled she would be with our friends who love and adore the dog they already have. Princesa would live a life fitting to her name- a Princess. A few days after her arrival she had blood in her urine so my friend took her to the vet. ( I guess you could say that this is one of the other things that she looks out for.) It seemed that she was more sick than we thought but that didn't stop us from dreaming for her. After a week or so, she came home from the vet and while she was still sick- she began to perk up and make herself at home. She really enjoyed having her own house and being inside with the indoor dogs. She spent her days hanging out on the back of the couch, soaking in the sun rays by the back door, and lying on the middle of a big doggie bed by my friend's computer. She ordered off of the gourmet menu eating things like soft dog food, rice, yogurt, little pieces of cheese and ham from our sandwiches and her favorite-hot dogs! Mmmm....she was preparing herself for a life of luxury after have been a tied up macasina (carport) dog all of her life.
On Tuesday morning, her breathing became labored and my friend decided to take her back to the vet. On the way, Princesa breathed her last breath. We were all shocked-even the vet who knew how bad she had been. He thought that she might have been poisoned and asked my friend to bring her to the office for an autopsy. He called today and gave us the report. The heart worm that she had tested positive for had been far to advanced. For those who don't know heart worm is a parasite that lives within the heart of a dog. Worms grow and multiple within the dog slowly choking the life out of the heart if left untreated. Dogs get infected when a mosquito bites an infected dog and then bites an uninfected dog during a later feeding. Because the heart worm had been left untreated for so long, there was nothing that we could have done; and it was a sad day at the ranch. Despite the sadness, we have been able to look at the brighter side and celebrate that in Princesa's last days, we were able to give her the life that we dreamed of for her. She died a very happy and very loved dog.
Now, why tell this dog tale? Well, I think it causes us to stop and reflect on a couple of things. You see, if we are not careful, we can get bitten by an infected mosquito; and then we will begin to grow a parasite that may eventually choke the life out of our hearts if left untreated for to long. As we are approaching Good Friday in just a few hours, I'm thinking that is not what God wants for us at all!! Scripture tells me in the famous verse (John 3:16) that "God so loved the world that He sent his only son so that none shall perish but have ever lasting eternal life." No where does this verse or any other verse state that God desires for us to have the life choked out us. In fact, Peter wrote that God is waiting patiently so that none shall perish.
So, what has bitten you? Who has bitten you? By identifying who or what has infected you is the first step in treating this heart killer. The power that it has over you is not as strong when you say it out loud because when it remains silent- it's a secret. A secret that Satan holds against you and torments you with. But when you have the courage to say it out loud it's liberating and you are no longer bound by your secret. This isn't about airing your dirty laundry to the world but it is about confessing your diseased heart to God- your creator and maker so He can operate on you and bring healing into your life. You may indeed decide to share whatever it is with a physical someone- someone who can walk with you on the journey. Someone who can pray for and with you. Someone who can be a vessel in which God uses but in order to bring on the healing process you must confess.
It's now Good Friday; and today we are going to remember Jesus' sacrifice on the cross- His dying for our sins, our transgressions. But, today is not the end...you see in three days, we will celebrate the Resurrection, the truth that He has risen, that He is ALIVE and that we are FREE in Him! He wants you to live like a princess or a prince. He wants you to have the best of everything- the lap of luxury! So, what's bitten you?
A few weeks ago, a guy from the streets who helps my friend clean the dog crates stood at our gate and begged her to take his mom's dog. Princesa, a real live ankle bitter....I mean chihuahua...looked like the majority of all of the other dogs who come through this ministry. They are extremely thin and in need and a great amount of TLC. So, we took her in. I took a picture of her and showed her to some friends who are actively searching for a second dog. I told them that after she goes to the vet for a check up- she would be all theirs. In the mean time, my friend and I began dreaming of the great life that she would have and how spoiled she would be with our friends who love and adore the dog they already have. Princesa would live a life fitting to her name- a Princess. A few days after her arrival she had blood in her urine so my friend took her to the vet. ( I guess you could say that this is one of the other things that she looks out for.) It seemed that she was more sick than we thought but that didn't stop us from dreaming for her. After a week or so, she came home from the vet and while she was still sick- she began to perk up and make herself at home. She really enjoyed having her own house and being inside with the indoor dogs. She spent her days hanging out on the back of the couch, soaking in the sun rays by the back door, and lying on the middle of a big doggie bed by my friend's computer. She ordered off of the gourmet menu eating things like soft dog food, rice, yogurt, little pieces of cheese and ham from our sandwiches and her favorite-hot dogs! Mmmm....she was preparing herself for a life of luxury after have been a tied up macasina (carport) dog all of her life.
On Tuesday morning, her breathing became labored and my friend decided to take her back to the vet. On the way, Princesa breathed her last breath. We were all shocked-even the vet who knew how bad she had been. He thought that she might have been poisoned and asked my friend to bring her to the office for an autopsy. He called today and gave us the report. The heart worm that she had tested positive for had been far to advanced. For those who don't know heart worm is a parasite that lives within the heart of a dog. Worms grow and multiple within the dog slowly choking the life out of the heart if left untreated. Dogs get infected when a mosquito bites an infected dog and then bites an uninfected dog during a later feeding. Because the heart worm had been left untreated for so long, there was nothing that we could have done; and it was a sad day at the ranch. Despite the sadness, we have been able to look at the brighter side and celebrate that in Princesa's last days, we were able to give her the life that we dreamed of for her. She died a very happy and very loved dog.
Now, why tell this dog tale? Well, I think it causes us to stop and reflect on a couple of things. You see, if we are not careful, we can get bitten by an infected mosquito; and then we will begin to grow a parasite that may eventually choke the life out of our hearts if left untreated for to long. As we are approaching Good Friday in just a few hours, I'm thinking that is not what God wants for us at all!! Scripture tells me in the famous verse (John 3:16) that "God so loved the world that He sent his only son so that none shall perish but have ever lasting eternal life." No where does this verse or any other verse state that God desires for us to have the life choked out us. In fact, Peter wrote that God is waiting patiently so that none shall perish.
So, what has bitten you? Who has bitten you? By identifying who or what has infected you is the first step in treating this heart killer. The power that it has over you is not as strong when you say it out loud because when it remains silent- it's a secret. A secret that Satan holds against you and torments you with. But when you have the courage to say it out loud it's liberating and you are no longer bound by your secret. This isn't about airing your dirty laundry to the world but it is about confessing your diseased heart to God- your creator and maker so He can operate on you and bring healing into your life. You may indeed decide to share whatever it is with a physical someone- someone who can walk with you on the journey. Someone who can pray for and with you. Someone who can be a vessel in which God uses but in order to bring on the healing process you must confess.
It's now Good Friday; and today we are going to remember Jesus' sacrifice on the cross- His dying for our sins, our transgressions. But, today is not the end...you see in three days, we will celebrate the Resurrection, the truth that He has risen, that He is ALIVE and that we are FREE in Him! He wants you to live like a princess or a prince. He wants you to have the best of everything- the lap of luxury! So, what's bitten you?
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Keeping It Real-From the Heart
Since I'm at the beginning of this Blog writing process, I think that I should state up front that I will try my best to keep my blogs as real as possible. What I mean is that I probably won't think twice about writing what's on my heart. This may mean shocking you with the fact that- Hey, I'm human! I make mistakes. I fail God. I please Him also. And you know what-I'll probably confess when I have failed and I'll celebrate when I have done well. But make no bones about it...what I share isn't about my feeling bad about myself when I have failed or boasting when I have done something really great. What it is about is being real and honest. It's about sharing life lessons; and it's about celebrating with God the great things that He does through us- His broken and less than perfect earthen vessels. It's about encouragement that if He can use me...then, what makes you think that He's not able to use you? It's about being inspired! It's really about Him and what He's doing....So, again, I invite you to join me on the journey...to watch and to experience what God does in my life and in yours!
Monday, March 29, 2010
Why now?
Welcome to my Blog. As I mentioned in the short blurb on the side, it's been on my heart to write for long time. I used to write poetry when I was growing up. Like for so many others, it was my outlet- my way of escaping- expressing myself-dealing with my emotions and all of the things that I went through while growing up. Writing was something that I really loved. I loved it so much that when I went to college, I majored in English with a writing emphasis. I thought for sure that I would go on and get my masters and teach others how to write poems; but I guess God had other plans. I graduated from college and I did take a class or two to begin the process of entering a master's program but I set the ambition aside to work full time and to volunteer in my local church. I also began to walk into a process of healing. It wasn't long before life became life and writing was set far on the back burner. Ironically, the more into the healing process I went, the less I desired or felt the need to write. I guess it wasn't necessary anymore as I found other ways of dealing with and expressing my emotions.
During this time, I felt a huge tugging on my heart to serve God on a more full time basis. So, in the Spring of 1998, I entered seminary to work on my Master of Divinity degree. Anyone who has done any post graduate work at all knows that studying eats all of your time. So, I continued the pattern of not writing anything except for assignments and papers. During this time, I continued walking through more healing. I came to a point where I found all of my old writings, the poems that I had written, and had been saving for I don't know what and threw them away. I didn't need them anymore. It was a symbolic shedding of the past and my moving forward into the future.
So, why begin writing again now? Well, the Lord has been tugging on my heart for a while-like since graduating from seminary- to write. But what? How? Where? Why? I have allowed all of these questions to be my obstacles/reasons for not writing anything-anywhere. But, God is gracious...and has a very funny sense of humor! I had asked God to convict me of my lack of writing...you know, because I have this awareness that I will get to heaven someday and He's gonna ask..."So, what did you do with the writing talent that I gave you?" And, I'm gonna be like..."Uhhhhh..." Well, a couple of months ago, I was preaching and talking to the church about using the gifts and talents that had been given to them. I share with them what I just wrote and said...God hasn't convicted me, He's just simply said..."You know what you should be doing- do it." Right after I said that, I read the passage in Matthew 25:14 and following of the parable of the talents. In the parable, the Master of the house is going away and gives three of his servants talents to take care of while he's gone. When the Master returns, the servants stand before him and share what they did with their talents. The first invested his and made double. The Master was pleased. The second did the same. Again, the Master was pleased. The third servant had the nerve to stand in front of the Master and tell him- "well, you know, I know that you are a hard man- so, out of fear, I buried your money. Here you go." The Master was so angry that he said.."you lazy and wicked servant." As God and the church were my witnesses- I was convicted. I by no means want to stand before God and hear him say to me..."You lazy and wicked servant!" So, here I am...writing....starting somewhere and allowing God to lead me on the journey. For now, I'm just sharing my thoughts with you. Things that I think about or insights that I might have..."A Ha!" moments...whatever the Spirit leads and lets see what happens....
During this time, I felt a huge tugging on my heart to serve God on a more full time basis. So, in the Spring of 1998, I entered seminary to work on my Master of Divinity degree. Anyone who has done any post graduate work at all knows that studying eats all of your time. So, I continued the pattern of not writing anything except for assignments and papers. During this time, I continued walking through more healing. I came to a point where I found all of my old writings, the poems that I had written, and had been saving for I don't know what and threw them away. I didn't need them anymore. It was a symbolic shedding of the past and my moving forward into the future.
So, why begin writing again now? Well, the Lord has been tugging on my heart for a while-like since graduating from seminary- to write. But what? How? Where? Why? I have allowed all of these questions to be my obstacles/reasons for not writing anything-anywhere. But, God is gracious...and has a very funny sense of humor! I had asked God to convict me of my lack of writing...you know, because I have this awareness that I will get to heaven someday and He's gonna ask..."So, what did you do with the writing talent that I gave you?" And, I'm gonna be like..."Uhhhhh..." Well, a couple of months ago, I was preaching and talking to the church about using the gifts and talents that had been given to them. I share with them what I just wrote and said...God hasn't convicted me, He's just simply said..."You know what you should be doing- do it." Right after I said that, I read the passage in Matthew 25:14 and following of the parable of the talents. In the parable, the Master of the house is going away and gives three of his servants talents to take care of while he's gone. When the Master returns, the servants stand before him and share what they did with their talents. The first invested his and made double. The Master was pleased. The second did the same. Again, the Master was pleased. The third servant had the nerve to stand in front of the Master and tell him- "well, you know, I know that you are a hard man- so, out of fear, I buried your money. Here you go." The Master was so angry that he said.."you lazy and wicked servant." As God and the church were my witnesses- I was convicted. I by no means want to stand before God and hear him say to me..."You lazy and wicked servant!" So, here I am...writing....starting somewhere and allowing God to lead me on the journey. For now, I'm just sharing my thoughts with you. Things that I think about or insights that I might have..."A Ha!" moments...whatever the Spirit leads and lets see what happens....
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